If you’ve ever felt like the world is just too much—too loud, too fast, too judgmental—and like you’ve been running on edge for years, you’re not imagining it. For many women, especially those navigating autism and trauma, life can feel like a constant balancing act between keeping up and holding it together.
At Evolution Wellness in Wilmington, NC, we often work with women in their 30s and 40s who are just beginning to explore the connection between autism and trauma. Whether it’s a late-in-life diagnosis, a long history of anxiety, or a deep sense that something has always felt different, understanding this overlap can bring real clarity—and practical tools for healing.
Autism in Women: The Misunderstood Mask
Autism in women is notoriously underdiagnosed. Why? Because girls are often socialized from a young age to mask their differences. Maybe you were the “quiet, sensitive” kid or the “smart but anxious” one. Or maybe you were praised for being polite, even when everything inside you felt overwhelming.
Masking becomes second nature. You smile when you’re confused or push through social situations even when they’re exhausting. You try to blend in—even at your own expense.
And over time, this chronic self-suppression becomes trauma.
Trauma Doesn’t Always Look Like One Big Event
When people think of trauma, they often picture a single, intense event. But trauma can also come from a lifetime of micro-injuries—being misunderstood, excluded, dismissed, or expected to operate like everyone else when your brain processes the world differently.
For autistic women, trauma may come from:
- Constantly masking or camouflaging your traits
- Being told you’re “too much” or “too sensitive”
- Sensory overload in everyday environments
- Social rejection or chronic invalidation
- Misdiagnoses (like anxiety, BPD, or depression) that miss the full picture
This ongoing experience of living in a world not built for your brain can create the same nervous system responses as “traditional” trauma. Hypervigilance, emotional dysregulation, burnout, anxiety—all of it.
How Autism and Trauma Interact
When autism and trauma overlap, they can amplify each other. For example:
- Autistic traits like sensory sensitivity can make trauma responses more intense.
- Trauma symptoms like hypervigilance can be misread as “just being autistic.”
- Autistic women may struggle to access appropriate trauma care due to misdiagnosis or stigma.
It’s not about fixing one or the other—it’s about understanding how both show up in your life and giving yourself permission to heal at your pace.
So… What Can You Actually Do About It?
Here’s the good news: You don’t have to choose between honoring your neurodivergence and healing from trauma. In fact, the best therapy does both.
Here are a few practical steps that can support healing:
✅ Find a therapist who understands both autism and trauma. At Evolution Wellness, we work with clients who need a space that’s sensory-safe, affirming, and neurodivergent-friendly.
✅ Ditch the mask (when it’s safe). Practice authenticity in low-risk environments. It’s okay to stim, say no, or not make eye contact.
✅ Use sensory regulation as trauma care. Weighted blankets, noise-canceling headphones, fidget tools, or even dim lighting can calm an overwhelmed nervous system.
✅ Name your needs. Whether it’s alone time, clarity in communication, or avoiding certain triggers, your needs are valid—even if they’re different.
✅ Be gentle with your healing timeline. You’re not behind. You are learning to care for yourself in a world that never taught you how.
You’re Not Alone—You’re Just Ready to Feel Seen
If this sounds like your story, you’re not broken—you’re navigating a world that often asks you to be something you’re not. And that’s exhausting.
At Evolution Wellness in Wilmington, NC, we’re here to support women navigating autism, trauma, and anxiety, whether you’re newly diagnosed, self-identified, or just curious about how things might connect.
You deserve care that understands your full story—and helps you write the next chapter with compassion, not shame.
Contact us today to learn more about therapy for autism and trauma in women.